The Punishment must Fit the Crime

I got really mad at myself on Friday.  

That's the worst; when you are mad at yourself.  In such a state you are both perpetrator and victim, and the worst part, there’s no escaping yourself.  We get mad at ourselves for all sorts of reasons.  Sometimes we say something we shouldn’t have, while others, we wish we had said something we didn’t.  How often do we play the “I wish I would have said” game? I know I do.  I suffer from confrontational disorder.  There are only a few times that I have actually been able to compose logical and thoughtful sentences when under pressure.  Adrenaline affects my ability to think properly and what should be purposeful ends up being emotional.  This is not at all what this blog is about.

I am training for an Ironman.  By “training” I mean trying my best to eat right, and to follow a training routine, but what I am really trying to do here, is to reach my potential.  Depending on you look at it, it can have little, or a lot to do with my competitive nature.  It is about achieving something that just a few years ago I thought impossible. 

I was mad at myself because I threw a bunch of roadblocks in front of this freight train. 

Friday

1. I was supposed to wake up and do a morning ride, but I slept in
2. I went to the beach to do an ocean swim but got scared because there wasn’t anyone else swimming so I didn’t go.
3. I planned to to a PM run in Taquara
4. I made myself feel better by eating a Lindt chocolate bar, a bag of Doritoes, two Sonho de Valsas, and two scoops of Nutella
5. I didn't do a PM run in Taquara

Saturday

1. I didn’t train. Again.
2. I will spare you the dirty details of my daily caloric intake. Let’s just say it was disgusting. 

Today, I woke up feeling very sluggish.  I knew why, and I hated it. 

Crime: kyboshing potential

Punishment: discovering potential

Today on my run I did my Taquara circuit.  The final 2.5km starts with a great hill climb.  It’s not a huge hill, but it hurts if you sprint up it.  After almost puking at the top of the hill I thought, if I can do that ten times, I can do anything.  

I sprinted up it ten times then celebrated with popcorn and a diet coke.  

This is going to be a long 11 weeks.  Race date:  November 27.  

Peace out!
Di.